Diary of a girl trying to adult – Entry 3

5 February, 2018

Ms. V worked in our auditor’s firm as a trainee. During the internal and statutory audit she always used to come to our Company. A lot of trainees would come over the course of time, but V remained a constant for a long time. Needless to say, we became great friends with her especially considering that she was from a similar age group.

We would every time, on their last day, give our warm regards to V and wish her all the best for the future, not knowing if we would see her again. So the last time she came to office, a week ago, she informed that her training term has come to an end. We were genuinely happy for her and hoped for a bright future for her, thinking that this would probably be the last time we would meet each other in this office.

But life always has different plans, doesn’t it?

V has always somehow been a pet of our boss, not that we disliked that fact. We just never gave it so much importance. So the last time she came, she had a good 10 minute chat with our boss. Nothing unusual we thought, because it’s her last day, our sir might want to speak to her since he has a special liking for her.

Fast forward to 4 days later, we see V again at office. We are sweetly surprised. Her term is over, what is she doing here? Maybe she will leave once our Company’s audit is over, we thought.

I later see a large diary milk being bought. I asked my office boy who bought it as to why was it bought. He says, our boss asked him to buy it, don’t know for whom. Now this was odd. He is a 65 year old human, why on earth would he buy a huge chocolate when he doesn’t eat any sweets. Everybody is curious now.

Next, I get to know that the chocolate is for V. My cleaning lady asks, why is V getting the chocolate, did she clear her exams? I said no. She didn’t clear the exams and all. Then she said, there will be some reason no, why will sir simply give such a big chocolate to her without reason? So we did some brain-storming and arrived at the conclusion that since V’s term is over, sir might have given the chocolate as a farewell gift. Good enough, we thought.

But again, life doesn’t go as we plan it. Right?

About 20 minutes later, I get a call on my extension, asking for her. She was in my cabin at that point of time. So I hand her the phone and she says, “Yes sir, for my joining only”

By now I am blown. Is V joining OUR office? So about 5 minutes later, when I gathered my thoughts, I asked her, V are you joining us? She said, not sure ma’am, I am just deciding on joining. I am in a whirl-pool of thoughts by then.

So I go to P (my colleague/ friend) and tell her the news. She is as stunned as me.

An hour later, our boss calls us for a meeting and officially introduces V as the new employee of the Company.

Did she just say, she is still deciding?? She had a 10 minute chat with our boss 4 days earlier. She knew she was joining and yet, she never uttered a word. AND, she was our “friend” for whom we wished good, all the damn time.

That day, me and P were terribly taken aback. We couldn’t speak to V properly at all. She should have at least told us.

That day, I realized, we were hurt because we trusted that she is our friend. We couldn’t talk to her because we felt betrayed. Why? She hasn’t committed a crime. Why did we even expect her to tell us in the first place? Just because we have known her for more than a year now, or that we considered her as our friend? Those expectations are what we plant in our hearts, not knowing that we have no duty whatsoever to plant them in us in the first place.

However close a friend she might have been, she was an outsider to our Company, why should she be bothered to inform me or P anything at all, not-withstanding the fact that she otherwise, came and discussed her family problems with us.

I realized humans always place a certain amount of trust and expectation on other humans, no matter how small or big they might be. In another place, this wouldn’t be such a big issue, but because it was V, we were hurt. We expect others to be fair to us, because we were fair with them. As I have read, that is like expecting the lion not to eat you, because you didn’t eat him. Also, we were hurt that our boss found it necessary to give her that huge chocolate, but never gave any chocolates to us, because whatever we might be, no matter the amount of sophistication I reach, I will always be greedy for my share of chocolates. Nobody ain’t stealing that from me or giving it away to somebody else in front of me!

Moral of the story: I didn’t end up getting chocolates. Also, for the ‘n’ th time understood that we shouldn’t be placing our trust, hopes or expectations in other people.

P.S. We still haven’t been able to speak to V properly. Hopefully, we will, in the coming days. Once we come to terms with our betrayal.

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