Dear Aneesha,

Life is tough and we tougher. We have almost spent a lifetime together right from innocence to maturity. And let me tell you that you are stronger than what you think or assume yourself to be. I know I suck at writing and probably you’ll be having the worst time reading (or if I say decoding) this letter. But I really wanted to gift you something that will make you realize your strength whenever you feel weak and weary.

You must be wondering where I am right now. By the time you’ll know, I’ll be gone…gone forever. Someone has rightly said ‘Life is what happens to you when you are busy making other plans.’ Aneesha, I know I have hurt you not just as a friend but also as your love. Sometimes, its just that the circumstances that are wrong and not the people. Please, read this letter once before deciding to discard it.

I still remember the time, when you confessed having feelings for me. I always had that for you but never had the audacity to keep our friendship at stake. I still remember, we were sitting in the restaurant and I was busy showing off my new scooter. You suddenly held my hand and looked into my eyes. I shivered a bit and thousand little butterflies were born in that little moment. I still cherish each of the time we spent together including the night ride when we kissed for the first time. Everything still holds afresh in my memory.

Aneesha…you were always Anu for me but now I know that I have lost that right. I left suddenly without an explanation but believe me that was the best thing I could think of. I would never able to justify my act but if I expect anyone to understand me the best, it is you. I had once mentioned about the medical examination that I had to go for availing the selected medical insurance plan. The result of this medical examination came the day we last met. The result said that I had ‘AIDS’. Yes, you read it right. I am a HIV-positive person. I discussed it with my doctor. Back then, we never did have a proper medical system in our little city. He said that my life-expectancy was questionable and there were other issues as well. I am sure you must be aware about this disease now.

I was shattered for I knew you would always hold my hand even if it meant leaving a meaningless life. But nothing was in my control. That has perhaps been the worst night of my life for I had to decide about us. Believe me, you had been an integral part of my life by now and living without you was worse than death. I had to make a tough choice. I know I should have consulted you before deciding anything…but I knew you so well by now that I was sure that given the circumstances you would never leave me even if meant going against your parents. I even knew that leaving you would shatter you. With a heavy heart and a lot of deliberation, I decided walk away from your life.

Years passed and as life would have it, I have managed to survive in this cold yet beautiful world. It has been a long journey.  I came to Chennai and since then I’m living here. I could not get any job anywhere due to this disease and hence had to work in a little NGO that supported this cause. That worked in my favour and I managed to start a Non-Profit business with this community. And today, I can proudly say that we have created enough awareness with our business having turnover of Rs. 12 Crore. I am happy with my life. I learnt that you recently became a granny. Congrats..I’m really happy for you from the bottom of my heart.

Why am I writing this now? Simply because I won’t be able to die with your hatred. Whatever may be the reason, I have hurt you deeply and steeply.  And you have all the right to get angry but please try to forgive me, if possible. Forgiveness is an attribute of the strong and I believe that life has moulded you strong enough.  Aneesha, don’t try to reach me because I won’t be able to survive till then and this will break you again. Simply, just forgive me from your heart and I’ll be free.

Once again, I plead for your forgiveness.

With tons of smiles and sorrys,

Mahesh

What do you think? Should Aneesha forgive Mahesh just because he is dying? Or  should she just forgive him to continue with her life peacefully? How will she react at this point in her life? We would love to hear your thoughts on this. Feel free to contact us on 4wtf.contactus@gmail.com.

Aneesha writes back on 03/03/2017. Stay tuned.

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